can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
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