I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
