I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
It was confusing and full of hummus
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize