Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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