this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Randomize
