Tell her she can't have a vagina
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
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