yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
She said her name was "party"
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
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