like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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