All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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