Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
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