She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
Randomize