one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize
