before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
there is glitter all over my balls
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
