some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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