just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Randomize
