I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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