dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
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