I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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