dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
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