Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
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