we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
