bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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