have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
