my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
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