For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
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