Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
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