You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Randomize