We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
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I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
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Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
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