I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
