I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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