He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
where are my pants?
in the oven.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
