I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize
