they need to just BURY HIM!
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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