And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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