My hand turned me down
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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