In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
Randomize
