jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Randomize
