I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
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I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
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I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
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