You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Randomize
