You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
