i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize