some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Boobs speak an international language.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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