I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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