let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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