i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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