i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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