What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize
