yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
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