I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
My vagina is officially offended.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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