Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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