i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
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